Trail #9 - Hash Trash

Trail #9

Location: Wampum Street, South Weymouth, MA

Hares: +2 Coon*ss and Yellow Dick Gnome

Pack:  From PooF - Bleeps, Sweeps, and Creeps, Counterfeit Dick, N*pples Erectus, THE 2nd C*mming.  From Boston - Bondage Barbie, Catheder the Great, Five Inch Penalty, Just Greg, Just Sarah, Nice T*ts, Peppermint P*ssy, Twat Tart.  From Boston Moon - I Eat Teabags, Kibbles B*tch, Twat My Mom.  From Burlington - Stops to Pet the P*ssy. From Seacoast - Friar F*ck

'Twas 5 minutes to hares-away and along Wampum Street, hashers were gathering despite the lack of heat.  When what to my wondering eyes should appear?  A missed call from Friar, our bag car calling from somewhere.  If you think I'm going to do this whole thing a la 'Night Before Christmas', you are crazy.  Hares  and pack both got a late start as Friar was delayed getting to the start - something about driving past a mall, being lured in by the brightly colored sale signs, buying his dog a diamond studded choker for Kwanza, and then having to fight his way thru the Santa picture line to get out.  As a result, everything got shifted 15 minutes, but thankfully the pack had beer to distract them during the wait, as well as the sight of Stops, 2nd C, and a late entrant T*ts, taking part in the Sangrita Flip challenge (note, this was Stops' 1st challenge on his way to becoming a Poof, T*ts' 2nd, and an extraneous/overacheiving challenge for 2nd C who is already an official PooFlinger).  I'm happy to say all three successfully completed the challenge, though 2nd C was looking a bit green during trail.

The start was at the end of a new cul-de-sac, and somehow appropriately, trail took off behind a dumpster and porta-potty and along power lines before entering the woods.  For a fair distance, pack found themselves fighting low brush, broken up only by areas of marsh, making r*nning all but impossible with occasional teasing glances and sounds of civilization...and gun fire.  Eventually pack clambered up some boulders and found themselves on a road, and a short distance later, the beer check.  From the BC, trail skirted along the edge of Weymouth Great Pond which was quite scenic, following the boggy edge for a short distance before heading into the woods along some well-worn paths.  The pack's sense of security quickly ended as trail soon left the lovely paths, but instead of finding more bushwhacking, pack encountered thorns.  While some other PooF trails have involved small dense areas of thorns, this leg of trail was a non-stop battle thru wider-spread, but unavoidable thorny vines, prompting me to ask you the reader, which do you prefer, a lot of big pricks for a short time, or a few small pricks that go on forever?  The answers to this poll will be published in next month's Penthouse.  Finally pack found itself out of the woods and onto a windy narrow road, playing an unwelcome game of chicken with oncoming traffic, and eventually into another cul de sac under development at the end of which was a berm, behind which circle was held.

As the last beams of daylight slipped away and the temperatures dipped even lower, Bleeps started circle, but not before two other challenges were started.  2nd C attempted the Evil Monkey challenge, but unfortuantly with 1 minute and very little beverage left, his stomach betrayed him.  Stops had a better time of it and with a can of spam in each hand, successfully completed the Barbie's C*mming challenge (something tells me he's had prior experience with this).

But back to circle, accusations included:

FRB - Kibble's B*tch / FBI - Just Sarah

DFL's - Catheder the Great and Peppermint P*ssy (the latter of which was then accused of hat in circle - not the last time she'd be accused of that)

PooF virgins - Kibble's B*tch, Just Greg, Just Sarah, Twat Tart, Five Inch Penalty

Getting thier official PooF tags - Counterfeit and 2nd C

Five PooF trails - Twat and Friar

No whistle - half the pack

Not having a 1st PooF tag either with them or at all - everyone except Gnome

Not having been at the last PooF trail - all the PooF virgins, Twat, Barbie, Stops, T*ts, IET

And as usual, a bunch of other stuff I can't remember (but if you can, let me know and I'll add it).

Circle ended with the RA forgetting the words to Amazing Hash, 2 people remembering, and the rest of the pack getting a -6.9 for effort.

All ajourned to the Abington Ale House for beers and good eats by the fireplace.

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